The most important thing every writer has to do is take a leap of faith.
What does that mean, exactly? That, no matter how stuck you are at the start of a book, or how unwieldy your manuscript becomes as you wade deeper into it, you have to believe in yourself enough to keep writing.
You have to shut out the external noise—the articles about six-figure advances, the dire news about book sales plummeting, the whining rants by other writers about marketing, even the criticism from your own critique group—so you can hear your own voice.
Easier said than done, right? I consider myself an old workhorse of a writer. I’ve survived rejections aplenty, and I’ve trashed more manuscripts than I can count because they didn’t go anywhere. Yet, recently the Writing Gods handed me two new challenges that felt insurmountable: 1) my beloved editor is taking a leave from the publishing company due to personal issues, and 2) the project swimming in my brain is something completely different from anything I’ve ever written.
I tried starting the new book. Over and over again, I struggled to put words on the page. But I stuttered, limped, wheezed, and finally came to a complete, crippled halt. I could not write this book. It was too hard. And who would I show it to, anyway, especially when my agent was advising me to write the entire manuscript before submitting it?
“You want to see where it goes,” she urged, “because it’s so different from what you’ve done before.”
Good advice. Yet, I couldn’t follow it. I had lost my writing mojo. Every time I put my hands on the keyboard, my fingers refused to move. I was in despair about my editor and convinced I couldn’t pull off this book.
Whenever other authors have confided in me about their own writing blocks or crises, I’ve given all sorts of advice: Attend a writing conference for inspiration! Go outside and do some digging in your garden! Start the book from the middle instead of the beginning! Try a completely different point of view!
All of these things have worked for me in the past, but this time? Nothing. Nada. Zilch. All I could do was nonfiction—I’m immersed in a ghost writing project at the moment—and lie awake at night, thinking, “That’s it. My career as a fiction writer is over. I can’t write this book.”
And then I received a surprise package in the mail: a gorgeous journal from my stepson, Drew, who had picked it up in Thailand during his travels. It’s my favorite color, a deep teal, and it has a silver elephant on the cover. Other women have a thing for roosters or kittens, but me? Give me elephants, baby. I’ve had a thing for them every since I rode one in Nepal.
Coincidentally, my son Blaise showed me his own journal, where he has started a new novel. “The thing about writing fiction in a journal is that it feels safe,” he explained. “Nobody is going to see it but you, so you can play around.”
And that’s when it hit me: I was terrified of putting words into my laptop because somehow that felt official. If I started the novel there, it would go to my agent, and then on to editors, and people would judge it. It might be rejected. Writing it in this gorgeous cloth journal, on the other hand, with an elephant as my lucky stalwart companion, would remind me of everything that matters most: my loving kids and the joy I feel when I create a story.
And so I began, one sentence at a time, just as writers have always done. Writing fiction in a journal has forced me to slow down, both mentally and physically. I spend a lot of time drinking tea and looking out the window. Coincidentally, my new novel is only scribbles at the moment, but you know what? Some of those scribbles aren’t bad. I think I have begun. I have made that leap of faith again.
15 Comments
Yay!!!!
Yay, indeed–because you know exactly which book I’m working on! Thanks, Ferriss!
I could copy and paste several parts of this piece and claim (accurately) that I was talking about my current WIP. I’ve even had to set it aside while I work on a non-fiction book instead, just to try to find my mojo. Maybe when I get back to it I’ll have to try writing longhand for a while … and staring out a window. Good luck with your WIP!
It’s so good to know that I’m not alone, Andrew. Good luck!!!
Hi Holly,
Thank you for yet another pertinent blog. I had a terrible time getting into my new novel. I started with a good chapter – then stalled. I kept thinking this is too hard. But now I am gradually feeling my way. I feel more positive. I have jumped in.
Caterina
I’m so glad to hear that you were able to push through the difficulties, Caterina. Sometimes I think “persistence” is the best quality for a writer to have–even ahead of “talent.”
What a cool story, Holly! The perfect present at the perfect time. Best of luck on the new writing journey! :O)
Thank you so much, Colleen. I get so much inspiration from your web site–writers everywhere should know about WritingandWellness.com!
Holly I love this. I am writing my first YA novel and it’s been challenging to say the least. I have tried every spot in my house, tried writing long hand and in the public library and ended up back at my desk staring at my computer. Finally I just threw another character into the mix to open up the story and hopefully that’s my fix. Good for you for persevering. If you need someone to talk story to — lemme know. I haven’t found my 3 writer people (Maria Geraci’s post) yet so I’m looking….
Thanks, Ellyn. I’m so glad you’re trying YA–that’s such an exciting field, and I have a feeling that you have just the talent to pull off a YA novel, with your energetic voice. I would be delighted to be one of your three people. Let me know anytime you want to talk story–or frustration. Thank you!!
So exciting 🙂 One sentence at a time is certainly a mantra I’d love to live by everyday
I think that’s the only mantra any writer needs! Thanks, Bernadette!
Holly, what a beautiful journal and gift from your son! I love journals, and have been writing in them for many many years. I just realized though I had not done so in awhile …it has always been my place to write, its the story of my life, unedited, a gift I need to give back to myself.
How wonderful that you can write your new manuscript in your journal, not on the laptop. Your son is right, its a safe place, and yes drinking tea, looking out the window is so true…and dreaming. Love your writing……
Ah, Carol, your comments always inspire me. And I agree: it’s time you to get back to your journal. That’s wonderful that you’ve kept one for years. One of my favorite belongings is the five-year diary my own grandmother kept for the first five years of her marriage. It’s full of single-sentence entries, like, “Canned the cherries today,” or “Donny’s walking and tipped over the hall table,” and I love the sense I get of the rhythm of her days when I read it.